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`PARENTING WITHOUT FEAR’ BY SIDDHARTH SHANKAR
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`PARENTING WITHOUT FEAR’ BY SIDDHARTH SHANKAR

Life & Living, Sept 05- Sept 11, 2026 September 4, 2026 , by

WE along with many other friends and fans of popular software engineer Siddharth Shankar are looking forward to a new book on parenting — titled “Parenting Without Fear.” By way of some hints on what the book is about an eloquent and articulate Siddharth shared:
 “Parenting is an opportunity to witness a new life unfold and facilitate the same. I did not always think this way.
Like most parents, I worried. I worried about making the right choices. The right school. The right education. The right opportunities. I wondered whether I was doing enough, whether I was doing too much, and whether one wrong decision could somehow affect my child’s entire future.
“And then, slowly, life taught me something else.
The future does not listen to our plans.
I have seen this in my own life. I have seen it in my family. And I have seen it across generations.
I grew up in a village in Bihar. My childhood was very different from the childhood my daughter has had. I watched my grandparents raise seven children. I watched my parents raise six. I have watched my sisters become mothers. I have watched families around me raise their children in completely different ways.
“And yet, there is no formula.
Put simply—koi guarantee nahi hai.
The most carefully planned childhood does not guarantee a particular outcome. The most unconventional path does not necessarily lead to failure. Children surprise us. Life surprises us. Sometimes what looks like a setback turns out to be an opportunity we could never have imagined.
I have experienced that myself as a child, as a professional, and most importantly, as a father.
When our daughter Anvita was growing up, we had to make decisions for which there was no ready-made answer. Some were easy. Some were painful. Some were questioned by people around us. We worried, we discussed, we made mistakes, and we moved on.
“But somewhere along the way, I began asking a different question.
Not:
How do I make sure my child has the right future?’ But: How do I make sure that, whatever future comes, my child is able to face it?’
That change in question changed parenting for me.
It made me realise that perhaps our job is not to shape a child’s life according to a picture we have created in our own minds. Our job is to provide a safe, loving and conducive environment in which a new life can explore, learn, stumble, discover itself and eventually find its own way.
This book is not about producing extraordinary children.
“It is not about finding the perfect school, choosing the perfect career, or getting every parenting decision right.

Memoirs of bringing up daughter Anvita Shankar who is today a noted young sitarist and musician


It is about becoming a calmer, healthier, happier parent who can enjoy the privilege of watching a new life unfold without being consumed by the fear of getting it wrong.
Because parenting becomes very different when we stop believing that we must control the outcome.
We can still guide.
We can still protect.
We can still set boundaries.
We can still worry — because we are human.
But perhaps we don’t have to live in fear.
Perhaps we can reach a point where, when life takes an unexpected turn, we can tell ourselves:
`Whatever happens, we’ll figure it out.’
“And perhaps that is one of the greatest gifts we can give our children—not the certainty that everything will be alright, but the confidence that even when it isn’t, we will find our way.
If this book helps you worry a little less, trust a little more, and enjoy the extraordinary privilege of parenting a little more deeply, it will have served its purpose.”
Little left to say here except that if you’re to be parents, apprehensive new parents, even if you are not parents – this will be a most readable book for our times when traditional systems of education are undergoing a revolution!

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